Waiting

Not really too much going on on the ADHD front right now besides the usual. I got my homework done put it up on the board critiqued it took it down to hand in to the professor and what did I do? I put it in my bag to take home.... What? Thank god my professor remembered that I had done it on time... Ugh. I'm waiting to hear from the office for word on if my paperwork has come in which should be soon but they have at least 30 days which seems like forever to me right now. 

In other news I'm sick while on the last leg of my design project. Grrr... I'm hoping that it doesn't turn into bronchitis like it typically does... but oh well... We are nearly at dress rehearsals I just hope that I don't fall asleep during them next week even the 4 hours I was on campus today wiped me out... I got two thirty minute naps in today though which is nice...

I think part of my issue with not feeling well is since I've been so busy I haven't exactly been eating the best which makes my impulses 10x worse. D: So my 'oh crap I wasn't able to pack my lunch today so I'm going to go get food turns into 'oh lets just do that for dinner too'. Luckily I haven't gone over my budget for the month yet but I'm pretty dang close! Blah! 

OH! I keep making bows too and they are really cute. If you want to see some more I typically post them up on my instagram 'sewingartist' is my username so look me up!

Oh and my room is a mess again... whoo.. so there is no update picture on that last post... Oops. Maybe next week after my three tests and my show opens?

Slipping

Whelp So it's now Thursday... 11 days to first dress... 14 days to Opening night. Three tests, two assignments, and 8 costumes to build during the next 2 weeks. PLEASE HELP ME!

Here's how the last week has gone so far though.
Yesterday I was given back my test from my acting class which went over actors, word of the day(is this now english too?), plays, and one of the books that we read. I got a whopping 44% on the quiz. it was a 30 question QUIZ. Thats a TEST. Anyways I was blamed for not paying attention and not spending enough time memorizing the material...

This morning I was given back my dimensions assignment from my drafting professor... I got a 65% on that one... Because... -drumroll- I wasn't paying attention. Apparently he want's it to be graduate level work or something too though. Yea I didn't really take the time that I should have(even though I worked on these for 3.5 hours), but I got everything labeled that needed to be labeled and in a way that was legible. I got a 4/5 on my lettering that I didn't use guides for so there was at least some saving grace on that part. It's really silly to expect gold from people who have never done drafting before and it is completely unrelated to their major. Please tell me the reason that I have to take drafting for costume design. I understand History of Decor, Scenic Design, Lighting Design, and all of the labs that we have to do in the different areas but Drafting? I don't get it at all. It's helpful in understanding the job that others do but that's really where the line stopped for me in understanding why I have to take this class. Trust me this class is no less important to me than any of my other classes I just don't GET it.

If this is how this semester is going with me designing a show I don't think that I will add my art minor... I might instead just focus on my main classes and finish the one art history course for my Art History Minor...

UGH. I'm really not sure what more I can do to get the help that I need...

This is one of the costumes that we are making for Alcina:

Designed by Myself.

Show stuff

I got an exciting few weeks ahead of me with the opera going up in a few week's time with everything going on in my classes. 

Luckily for me on that drafting homework that I submitted late wasn't counted a letter grade down even though it would have only been a C grade but now I have a B so that's great! I also got my drafting test back and got a B on that as well which is fantastic for not studying at all. 

I did clean my room but I forgot to take after pictures hopefully I can get those up later tonight once I get home after doing a few more things for my show and after  geology lab. I'm a little upset right now with how some of my peers in the shop have been reacting to us having more work calls since my cutter draper wasn't able to work on the show until last friday due to the other cutter draper getting overwhelmed by the size of the show that we just put up. So it is getting kind of crazy around here. I've already picked up a few of my old bad habits to keep me calm and focused which I'm a little ashamed of. One of which being smoking. I don't smoke much but I like one sometimes because it gives me a good excuse to take 5 minutes off without having someone question why I need a few minutes to myself. 

Bleh. Anyways I'm trying to be more organized too I got my Drafting homework finished early so I can hopefully start on the next assignment a little earlier since I'll be busy. I also have a big project due on the 6th and a test that is also on the 6th of March which is opening night but I hope that I can plan my life accordingly between then and now. 

~Elizabeth S. 

ADHD Diet Image

I made this a few weeks ago but I finally saved it in jpg format to post it.

This does not mean that this is ALL that you eat. Just what should be included into your diet. You can do a heck of a lot with a little though. I usually get tofu, chicken, avocados, fruit, seaweed, and sweet potatoes every week plus a few other things like almond milk and walnuts. I try to stay away from eating breads and candies but trust me I still do I downed an entire box of Lemon Heads this morning and have cookies that my mom made me that are staring me in the face. Eeep!

Room update: Desk is clean, trash taken out, laundry is getting washed and I'm starting to hang up clean clothes that were on the floor. I got several medium sized plastic baskets that I got at Dollar Tree and a little drawer thing to hold tacks and things. I'll post a picture once it's done.

~Elizabeth

Therapy #2

So yesterday I met with my therapist. It was an hour long session and we talked about what has been going on. We talked about management strategies that I already use and how I can improve on them. One of the main things was getting organized so that I can locate my things, then we talked about making lists for each day and setting a specific time and place to do my homework. She also thinks that I need to get on medication but we have to get my paperwork from the place that had diagnosed me before she can refer me to a psychiatrist so I'll have to wait till they get that in, which should be a few weeks but my next appointment isn't until the 14th of March which is after my show goes up.

I'm going to work on all of this today as well as my lighting project today since the mechanic said that they were too busy to replace my belt today(ugh). And my mom gave me a $15 gift card yesterday to hobby lobby so I can probably go pick up a few cute baskets for my room and some cute scrap book paper to label them with. She got onto me when she saw my room. I mean I'm the one who lives in it so it's not like she has to see it but my bathroom was at least alright. I know it looks awful but I haven't had any time.

Last night I decided I would start small and clean my bathroom and make my bed which looks great I had forgotten I cleaned my bathroom though so that was a bit of a surprise this morning... I have all of my hair accessories at the top of my mirror now so I can just reach up and grab one instead of searching for them.

Here is my bathroom right now(wearing my heart shirt for v-day)

And this is my room right now... D: Don't judge me too much... 

Most of the stuff at the very bottom is my trash that I am taking out today though so there is that...

Oh and here is a picture of that drafting homework. This was the easy part.

~Elizabeth

Why am I so early?

I got to school about an hour ago(8AM) and I don't have class until 9:30 though. I knew I got out early because I needed to go to CVS to get candy for my scene in acting class but getting on campus is a little too early... So why am I so early? 

Luckily 40 minutes till class I remembered that I needed to print off my Award winner assignment. Which is Edward Gorey one of my favourite illustrators!! So I ran to the printing lab and printed it off. the 7¢ grey scale printer was out so I had to use the 35¢ colour one even though my paper and pictures are all in grey scale.... Oh well... 

I have my lines memorised now though!!!

Pulling it together

I got very little sleep last night due to working late(11PM) and having to do homework. Tonight I got out normal time (5PM) but I had lab till 8PM. I've been working on drafting and attempting to memorize lines for a scene that i have to preform tomorrow. Memorizing lines is so hard right now since I have so much to do and remember right now so it's a struggle to get things in my head. Luckily I know the sorter ones pretty well just the longer ones are difficult.

I'm starting to get nervous about friday too... I don't know what to expect and how much therapy will help...

Breakfast- walnuts & chocolate chips apple grape juice
Lunch- turkey, carrots, strawberries, black berries, & mushrooms.
Snack- chocolate, lemon cake slice(edit:I forgot about the cake)
Dinner- spicy tuna avocado sushi roll, Sweet potato, butter.

I might start putting down Food since it can be a huge impact on my day.

Crashing down.

Right now I feel like my life is spiraling out of my control. I can't grasp the idea of a project that is 3 plates that are 18x24 each and I can only work on it weekdays 8AM- 7PM... with 33 blocks of math each and they all take somewhere between 15- 30  minutes for each box. So thats around 8.25-16.5 hours to just do the boxes not even including the actual layout of the plates...
It was due at 8AM this morning and I can't really get a proper extension since I can't get help yet from the learning center... I should be able to get it done by Thursday morning...

Drafting is hard and the requirements is completely unreasonable... We only had 1 1/2 weeks to do this project while everyone was finishing up Drowsy Chaperone; I was completing my design assignment since we start the build on that at the end of this week and getting my portfolio ready for today. I really don't know how time got away from me but I also do know... I need help... and bad cause I know I'm a good student and I hate myself for not getting things done on time.

This is a common view of mine in the shop. You can see Robert at his cutting table.

Being gifted sucks.

Just being honest from my point of view.

Being gifted with talent or intelligence is the worst. I'm constantly running in first while others try and trip me up like it's some kind of sick competition. I'm wonderfully gifted at art but I hate admitting that to my peers because I know for a fact that it is true. Some of them hadn't even heard of a colour wheel till they took a drawing and rendering class in college. I was shocked to be honest since they had boasted about their skill. I've tried to hide mine but once they see they are devastated and loose their own confidence... That's the worst part... Without me doing anything but allow them to glance or look at my sketch book pages I have destroyed someone's ego and caused them to think they will never succeed. It hurts my soul to see it, some hide it behind praise for how great my hand is but I can still see the pain in their eyes.
The same goes with fixing things in the shop or sewing. I can be given the same project at the same time and finish it before the other person is half done and it is generally as close to perfect as it can be... I hate it. I work hard and that is all I strive to get things done so I can move onto the next thing.

Yesterday was no different... I was caught in the cycle I had to present my designs for the opera Alcina that we are working on... I feel disgusted with myself seeing the defeated look of 20 people all at once. It hurts. I sped through my presentation partially because of this and partially due to my 20 minutes getting cut to 10. Mortified. I got praise and I also got looks of distain as I walked out. This is also a graduate level project not a first design assignment for an undergrad...

Today I was given a complicated project that after the fact I was told was something they normally would have given to one of the professional shop staff but they were too busy with other builds... All that time I thought that I was working way too slow but the jacket looked like it had been to the professional tailor so I guess I did well...

 Ugh. 

Tuesday I have a portfolio review at 12:30 with the painting professor to tack on an Art minor to go with my Art History minor. I might overwork myself a little too much... Oops. 18 hours for both of my final semesters for undergrad? Don't mind if I do. 

This is one of the many gem's from my portfolio.

Appointment with therapist on the 14th... Valentines day... ugh. 

~Elizabeth

My intro

I've struggled with ADHD/ADD symptoms since I was 10 I was diagnosed around the age of 12 and put on Concerta they upped my dosage way too quickly(72mg!!) and I began to get awful side effects and passed out in class. Needless to say at 12 that scared me out of medicine of any kind for several years. To this day I am still weary of taking medications but much better.
Through the rest of Middle School and High School I managed my ADHD symptoms through keeping active with ballet and drawing. I've always been a gifted artist so that was my primary way of drawing me back in and settling me down or keeping my hands busy while a teacher talked. I was always getting into trouble for making my sketch book out but a few teachers understood once I explained why I had to do it. When they would take it away I would just space out or I would sit there and fidget till I drove my class mates nuts.

 I'm a bit of a geek and can't decide on a haircolour.

Now I'm in my 4th year of college and my symptoms have been becoming unmanageable. I fidget, stare off, forget to do my readings, forget to buy books, get distracted by a new project at work when I haven't finished the last one yet. My work isn't exactly the most ADHD/ADD friendly.. I work in theatre. Its a world where you give your soul to a production, it runs for a week then it's taken to the dry cleaners and hung on metal hangers till someone else wants to put it on an actor. It's so quick paced which I enjoy because you go from one thing to the next but occasionally I'll get three different jobs at once and I'll get so confused on what needs to be done first. I get into trouble for that a lot...

Since my symptoms have becoming unmanageable I have been trying to eat healthier, workout when I have time, and schedule myself. I am currently eating a semi-paleo diet and I don't eat dairy. I've been doing a little better but it's hard to eat extremely healthy on a student budget especially when you have social friends who don't have dietary restrictions. I'm also starting to see a therapist at the school medical center for my symptoms and talking about whether or not medication is a good option for me. I guess for now what I'm doing will work but the anxiety that my symptoms cause is almost debilitating.

 This is one of the theaters that I work in for school 

And this is one of my pieces of digital art. (1hour drawing)

Till next time! 

~Elizabeth S.